Thursday, June 9, 2011

Writing this made me feel so much better

I found this quote before Ainzley was born and fell in love with it. It's everything I didn't know about my self and everything I want Ainzley to remember as she grows up and goes through difficult times. I had this cut in vinyl and put it on a picture frame for her. I added her name at the top of the quote:

Daughter of Divinity
Be strong and of good courage
You are truly a royal spirit daughter of Almighty God.
You are a Princess destined to become a Queen
Your own wondrous story has already begun
Your Once Upon A Time is Now
~ Dieter F Uchtdorf

As silly as it may sound, I never knew any of this about myself. I always had self confidence, though and respected who I was. I didn't try to be someone everyone would like. My friends were people I genuinely liked and wanted to be around and they liked me for me. I was always proud of myself knowing that I was presenting my true self and other people liked being around that.

Somewhere, I lost that.

People around me make me feel (honestly?) like crap sometimes. But that's bound to happen - can't change someone else. What sucks is how I let it get to me. I dwell and over analyze. Suddenly I have these hurt feelings and resentment that just eats at me for days sometimes. People ask me questions then talk in circles questioning why I am the way I am, basically... sometimes, it borderline chastising! I get that not everyone is going to see eye-to-eye, but respecting those differences is important, not giving them the 3rd degree. People tell me how important I am to them, then forget about me when something or someone else better comes along. I was always proud of my matter of fact-ness and being forward and honest with people. Now I'm looked at as a witch. I wish I could just be loved for who I am.

I am a Daughter of Divinity.
I will be strong and of good courage.
I know my mortal mission, where I came from, and my divine destiny.
I was given my many traits and my personality because they are GOOD. Differences should be embraced, not frowned upon.

I refuse to be around people who would belittle me or make me feel less than what I am: a royal spirit daughter of Heavenly Father. I deserve better than that and I will make sure my kids do. My family needs me the way I was created. I will use my strengths and talents to raise a righteous family. I will live up to the person I know I can be and who my Heavenly Father wants me to be.

PS I am not referring to my husband at any way in this post. He is the best and I am so happy to be married to him for eternity :)

1 comment:

Caryn Allen said...

I'm getting those SAME things right now from people I knew in high school and even from my ridiculous brother. I can't freaking believe it. Last week was SO stressful because of it. Good for you for keeping your chin up and focusing on what's important.

Throughout my late adolescense and adulthood, I have had many positions (professionally and volunteer basis) that have helped me develop skills necessary to serve as a liaison to the community on behalf of a professional organization. I have spent many years in various organizations which have helped me grow skills such as public speaking, note taking, and scheduling. I am proficient in organization and mediation – always keeping the mindset of finding middle ground and while meeting the needs of those involved. I excel in the area of community outreach and thrive in situations where I am given reign to be creative and managerial. I am committed to achieving the best outcome and feel I have many fantastic qualities to contribute to any organization.